A Waist Is A Terrible Thing To Mind

I saw myself on TV recently. Not literally but figuratively.  Literally figuratively. As in… my figure.

There can’t be too many folks who’ve not seen that Dancing with the Stars clip of Kirstie Alley’s partner not being able to hold her up and they both take a tumble.  That clip came to mind when I weighed at the grocery store yesterday.  The scale hit 172…for the second straight week.  That’s a new high for me.

Usually, my weight is between 160 and 165.  In 2006, it dropped to 155 after four weeks wandering in Spain but since then it’s crept back to what I consider normal. So what’s with the weight gain?

I’m rounding up the usual suspects.  Winter is a prime conspirator.  It was too cold to walk.  And walking is especially important this time of year because of all the seasonal indulging, which for me has extended past winter.

I’m still working on the 10 pounds of fruitcake I bought “for Christmas.”  I still have four pounds of it.  And four pounds of summer sausage I bought on the Internet. Then there were the winter ice cream sales.  There’s also quite a bit of chocolate which we picked up at ridiculous prices at the Russell Stover clearance warehouse in Ocala.

Work is a big culprit too.  Every month, we’re celebrating someone’s birthday with cake and ice cream.  I’ve been bringing doughnuts one Friday a month thanks to a perennial “buy one dozen, get one dozen free” coupon Krispy Kreme has been running.  A co-worker brings sausge McMuffins once a month.  Then there’s the killer pound cake a another co-worker’s wife (who has a home baking business) bestows upon us about once a month.

And when I’m out of the office on a business trip, I’m eating at some mom and pop “country cooking” restaurant that small rural towns are infamous for.  These are places where $8 gets you meat, two sides, cornbread (hoe cake version if you’re lucky), dessert and beverage.

Week before last, I was at Quincy’s West End Grill and could barely walk out after a generous portion of pulled pork, mashed potatoes, turnip greens, cornbread and carrot cake.  I always look forward to a Marianna trip because lunch will be at Dino’s, which has a Godzilla calzone which can feed two.  And I’’ve got two projects in Apalachicola, which means I can hit Boss Oyster at least four times over two years and start lunch with a dozen raw on the half shell.

Now that the weather’s pleasant, Ive been taking my traditional 20 minute walk around the office park after lunch.  And, I’m parking under a tree about 200 yards from the office, so I get some exercise while keeping my  car cool.  I thought I might see a pound or two reduction but I did weigh just after a rare lunch buffet (which was mostly salad and veggies).

But a weight loss opportunity is approaching.  I’ll be in Vegas for the first week in May.  I almost always lose weight on vacations because I walk a lot and eat less sweets than I do at home. Since we’ve been to Vegas so much, we don’t indulge in any bacchanalian wining and dining.  Typically, we’ll take in two of the various “under $10” steak dinner deals, a Filipino meal, and whatever deals we may stumble upon.  We don’t’ eat much pizza, burgers or desserts. (But since I do have a $10 P. F. Chang’s gift card from an Internet purchase, I may treat Susie to the Great Wall of Chocolate after a sensible “dinner” of lettuce wraps.)

So I expect to be back down to 165 by the time we return. And if not, there’s going to be a less exciting weight loss opportunity: mowing the yard every other week once we start getting rain.

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4 responses to “A Waist Is A Terrible Thing To Mind

  1. As I read back through this, I realize it isn’t winter or work that is getting you into trouble, it’s your inability to pass up a deal! Free food, cheap food, two-for-ones, coupons, etc. I see people at buffets go back two or three times with a whole plate of food each time in order to feel like they’re “getting their money’s worth”, or maybe, just because they can. For me it’s, what’s that called, aversity conditioning? Enough times of eating so much you make yourself sick and you stop (even rats learn to avoid electric shocks). I also solve the problem by rarely going to buffets. Same reason I don’t go to casinos 🙂

  2. I’ve always been on the heavy side of ‘normal’ and when you live in Asia, the extra pounds are pretty obvious :<
    I spent a week in Canada and oh god their servings are so big it could feed two people [I shared with my mom] and when I cam home I gained 2-3 pounds.
    Sob.
    A few weeks later and I weigh myself. Ho-ly shit I have a new high score [112] oh nooo..
    I used to be a 98-100 and all I really want is to lose this horrible 10 pounds. Sure, my being 100 was like, in the 4th grade and I'm a sophomore now but still. The ideal weight for my age is 105. So that means I need to chop off 7-8 pounds.
    Compared to others I don't eat a lot but the thing is, I don't exercise. Now I could easily blame my mom, who always leaves me at home alone with a lot of food, and that she doesn't like me to go outside without her because its dangerous and I might get stabbed/killed/raped/pulled into a car and yes these thing do happen here so I do listen to her :<
    sigh. well I think that youre an adult and you can take care of yourself and walk when you need to, so let my try and give you some advice and stuff.
    well. get a pet. a puppy. this puppy will eat and shit and destroy things that you need to pay for. spend money on other things instead of food. or if youre like me and youre into painting/drawing, well. spend your money there. masking fluid costs around.. $4 dollars in US dollars. that bottle is as big as an eye drops bottle.
    or you could save. buy lots and stuff. 🙂
    stupid comment, but still :<

  3. You’re going to come back from Vegas lighter? I’ve never been there, but I’ve never known anyone who pulled that off. They should have to build a statue to you when you pull that off.

    • We’ve been there 25+ times, so the overindulgence is history. I will report the precise (well, within one pound) loss when we turn. Of course, I had some unexpected assistance…Wednesday night I developed a urinary tract infection. That should be good for a pound or two….I’m on a week of Cipro so it should be cleared out by the time we leave for Vegas.

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