You Can Teach An Old Geezer New Phrases

AARP promotes 50 as “the new 30.”  Approaching 58,  I understand that my generation is different from the previous AARP generation but I’m not so sure we’re the new 30 either.

I’m reminded almost daily of my advancing age.  Earlier this year, I began taking blood pressure medication, even though I’m just “pre-hypertension.”  Last week, I had an eye exam because it had been seven years since the last one and it occurred to me that if I did need a new prescription then I’d almost certainly find a deal.  I’ve gone from progressive bi-focals to progressive trifocals.

I was right about the deal: Penney’s gave me the frames and lenses for just $99.  (The frames alone were marked $79.)

Being asked at restaurants if I want the “senior discount” is one positive aspect of all this.  As is qualifying for a “mature traveler” rate at hotels.

But it’s not so much the physical signs of aging I find disconcerting.  No, it’s the increasing sense that I’m in the linguistic boonies.

This feeling was reinforced twice within just a few days.  First, another blogger commented on a post I wrote about search engines terms used to find my blog that a search term she noticed used to find her blog was “tramp stamp.”  I had no idea what that term meant and had to Google it to learn it is a woman who has a tattoo on her lower back.  I wonder how long that phrase has been around before I belatedly learned about it?

A few days later, I was discussing with some co-workers a “1,000 extra points per night” promotion that Hampton Inn was come out with.  A new, younger co-worker walked in on us and blurted out that she’s a “point whore.”  I’d never heard that term either, but as a frequent traveler I quickly grasped it’s meaning.  Yes, where I stay is often influenced by any special point deals I can take advantage of.  So I’m a point whore myself, although I wouldn’t put it that way in a conversation.

Now I’m wondering how many other phrases have entered the lexicon that I’m clueless about.  Maybe someone should create a website of “new phrases clueless geezers may not know” for folks like me.  You can jump start my education by leaving a comment about any phrases you’ve recently learned and what they mean (if it’s not obvious).

Really, it’d be so outtasight if you can help me because right now I can’t dig it when I hear these new phrases and so it’s like a really bad trip.  It’d be so groovy if you sock it to me and blow my mind with these right on phrases.  Thank you!


18 responses to “You Can Teach An Old Geezer New Phrases

  1. Ahem, I believe the tramp stamp is not the woman, but the tattoo itself. Theoretically, it should be possible to have one without being a tramp oneself 🙂 I am totally unable to help you on your quest, being pretty clueless myself. However, I highly recommend eehard as a resource. He taught me that “whip”=car.

  2. WTF? I paid over $400 for my trifocals at the Hour Glass and you got yours for a “yard?” Did you have a coupon or are your glassess like coke bottles?

    btw, a “yard” = $100

    • Don’t make a big buy without getting my opinion… I know where those deals are!

      It was a special at Penney’s….

      And yes FN, it is the tatt0o, not the woman.

  3. Personally, I’m wishing I could buy a new whip for a yard.

  4. Until recently, I didn’t understand what it meant to be “jonesin” for something. (Desiring it.) I didn’t know about “whip” or “yard.”

    To help you on your quest for understanding, try this:

    • Now I can see that jonesing is from “keeping up with the jones’, but I don’t see where “whip” or “yard” come from.

      Thanks for the link. I’ll be checking it out!

  5. Don’t overdo it Fakename! LOL

  6. by Bob Dylan

    May God bless and keep you always,
    May your wishes all come true,
    May you always do for others
    And let others do for you.
    May you build a ladder to the stars
    And climb on every rung,
    May you stay forever young,
    Forever young, forever young,
    May you stay forever young.

    May you grow up to be righteous,
    May you grow up to be true,
    May you always know the truth
    And see the lights surrounding you.
    May you always be courageous,
    Stand upright and be strong,
    May you stay forever young,
    Forever young, forever young,
    May you stay forever young.

    May your hands always be busy,
    May your feet always be swift,
    May you have a strong foundation
    When the winds of changes shift.
    May your heart always be joyful,
    May your song always be sung,
    May you stay forever young,
    Forever young, forever young,
    May you stay forever young.

    May your Colonoscopy be empty
    May your Blood Pressure be slow
    May your joints all work real easy
    And your PSA be low
    May your poker hands be winners
    As the game of life moves on
    May you stay…..forever young

    • PT..what song is that from? I need to get the MP3!

      I like that last stanza, which you obviously added…lol!

      I think I heard Rod Stewart do that song but of course it’s hard to understand him.

  7. Anarchist, I don’t think slang terms are required to have a recognizable precursor. I don’t get whip and yard myself. The important thing is, now I know them, and I am cool.

  8. Fakename, if you keep proclaiming to be cool I am going to need a tall glass of “tolerance juice.” LOL

  9. Okay, fine, I’m not cool, but I’m cooler than I was 🙂

  10. How funny, Anarchist! I finally found “whip”. Did you find “yard”? See look at us, having to look it up. Whereas you have your tuned-in people who don’t have to.

  11. You guys are my friends but you are totally hopeless. LOL. Stick to golly, gee, and neat.

  12. Neat comment, Nick. You are a pip. Quite the cat’s meow.

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